


Down The Line

by brokenhighways



Category: Hit the Floor (TV)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Break Up, Canon Compliant, Future Fic, M/M, One Shot, Retirement
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-15
Updated: 2017-07-15
Packaged: 2018-12-02 11:14:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,636
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11508249
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brokenhighways/pseuds/brokenhighways
Summary: Down the line, Zero contemplates retirement.





	Down The Line

**Author's Note:**

> Written for this [prompt](http://team-zude.dreamwidth.org/90688.html?thread=17984#cmt17984) @ team_zude. It's less than 5000 words long too. FINALLY. 

The thoughts comes in fits and starts. 

_ I'm not getting any younger.  _

_ Maybe it's time to call it quits. _

_ I'm tired.  _

_ Not strong enough. _

_ Can't keep doing this.  _

In an ideal world, Zero would have no problem knowing when to give up. He'd look at his reflection one day and instantly know that it's time. That he's achieved everything that he wants and it's  _ enough  _ that he won't have any regrets. 

Unfortunately for him, the world of professional basketball is anything but  _ ideal.  _

He's pushing thirty-six and the team are pushing whatever wonderkid that's going to sell the most jerseys.  __ He's like an earlier model of a popular car. Stable, mostly reliable, but in need of an upgrade. 

In a way, he's okay with calling time on his career. It's been a long time since he turned pro, even longer since he played college ball. He's been very successful. He's got three rings; he can walk away any time he wants to.

There's just one catch. 

“It has to be on my terms,” Zero finds himself saying as he and his agent leave yet another frustrating meeting. 

His agent mutters something agreeable, but he's glued to his phone anyway. The guy's some young hotshot who the agency threw at him when they decided to redirect their best talent elsewhere. They might as well just stamp 'has-been’ on Zero's forehead because that's what it feels like. 

By the time he reaches the parking lot, Jude's waiting for him by his car, his ear pressed to his cell as per usual. He steps forward just as Zero reaches his car. 

“Well?” Jude asks expectantly after he ends his call. “Any luck?”

“You're still stuck with me,” Zero retorts dryly while he's fishing out his keys. “Congratulations.”

The thing about being a public figure is that often, what people see and what's  _ real _ differ greatly. 

Right now, people see him and Jude as this star couple who have withheld the pressure of being in the public eye for a long period of time. They've even outlasted at least ninety percent of the  _ Basketball Wives.  _

However, what people don't know is that they broke up three months ago after someone leaked the fact that the Clippers were offering Zero a one-year deal worth more than his final year with the Devils.

Zero didn't want to leave and Jude thought it was a good idea. It was just the latest in a long line of arguments and somehow Jude left and didn't come back. Not that Zero wanted him too, though, because that final argument was all kinds of nasty.

Even now the mere thought of it still leaves a bitter taste on his tongue. 

“We wouldn't be in this position if you'd just listened to me,” Jude says, because somehow it always goes back to that. He's always right and Zero has no idea what the fuck he's doing. 

It's easy to pinpoint when everything changed. 

It started out with a widescale fraud investigation that ended with the League forcing out every single member of board that was linked to Oscar Kinkade in any way.

There was months of uncertainty, months of Zero persuading Jude that it wasn't the end of the world. There would be a better job, a better team. 

There were months where they were apart, while Jude built up his reputation in Ohio on account of Zero putting a good word in for him. 

After a year, Jude made the switch to the Clippers and they were back together. Back on the magazine pages, back on the blogs. 

They were love’s young dream until they got older and became jaded. The shiny gloss wore off and left a dull matte finish in its place. Maybe their breakup was always inevitable. 

“You wanted me to switch teams within the same city,” Zero points out. “Like I needed  _ another _ reason for people to hate me.”

It's a conversation they've had countless times over the years. Despite the success and the number of times they make the playoffs, Zero’s never going to be a Devils  _ legend.  _ Being an out player was difficult enough but his tumultuous reputation made him an easy target whenever the team hit a rough patch.  __

Jude's mouth twists but he remains silent because he knows that Zero moving across the city would have been a  _ bad  _ idea. He didn't suggest it for business purposes, but being together didn't mean that they had to work for the same team. 

It didn't feel right that it was easier for Jude to make an offer for him than it was to admit that he  _ missed  _ him. 

“Whatever, Zero, just let me know the outcome by the end of the week,” Jude says quietly. “Any events I need to know about?”

“We've got a charity ball on Tuesday,” Zero says blankly. “Black tie.”

Jude rolls his eyes at Zero's tone and says. “Text me the details.”

He walks away before Zero can say another word. 

~

Zero wants to play for two more seasons, but the board think he's only got one left. No other team is pushing for him at the moment and short of asking Jude if the Clippers are still willing to give him a shot, he's out of options. 

“What we need is a guaranteed money maker. Some kind of story that keeps people interested. Like a wedding?”

Zero gives his agent a murderous look. 

“Okay, so maybe not that, but  _ something.”  _

It's always something. 

That's what takes Zero from  _ two more years  _ to  _ maybe one is good.  _ He's done playing pretend or doing things because it helps his brand. The endorsements, the commercials, the public appearance. In the past, he was in it for the money but he's got more than enough now. 

At the moment he just feels like some kind of sideshow puppet, like people tug on a string whenever they need something for him and he's pulled up and down. 

“Forget it,” he says gruffly. “Let's just take the deal and we can maybe put out a statement saying that this is my last year.”

“A statement? The team is going to want to make  _ bank  _ from this. I'm talking TV specials, as many charity events as they can get away with, endorsements. Retirement is a big deal, you know, they're going to be all over you…”

Zero tunes out his agent, huffing out a bitter laugh because making bank is the furthest thing from his mind. 

He keeps replaying the conversation with Jude over and over, like a broken record player. Maybe it's not just basketball he needs to let go of. 

Maybe it's everything else that comes with it. 

~

Jude comes over the day after Zero makes his decision, ostensibly to  _ talk _ , but these days they barely seem to be able to do that.

Instead there are strained words, tight facial expressions and a tinge of regret. 

Half of the time Zero doesn't even know what they're fighting about, which makes it hard to know how to fix things. Or figure out if he even  _ wants  _ to fix things. 

“I spoke to your agent,” Jude says, and he sounds surprised, like he thought Zero was bluffing about retirement. “You're really doing it. This is your last year.”

Zero nods. “Yeah. Coach T is probably going to bring me off the bench for most of the season but our team is strong. We have a real shot at t--”

“I'm not a reporter, Zero,” Jude interrupts stiffly. “You don't need to sell it to me.”

Zero rolls his eyes; he's not sure why he's even telling Jude any of this. It's not like it matters to him anymore.

“I was thinking that we could make some kind of separation announcement by the end of the week,” Zero adds. “That way we can draw the line under everything - under us - and be done with it.”

For the first time in the conversation, Jude looks affected. Considering that he's been pushing for this for months, Zero doesn't understand why. 

“What's the rush?” Jude asks, swallowing audibly as the last syllable leaves his mouth. 

Zero stares at him, before he furrows his brow and says, “We're not together anymore, Jude. I'm done with the charade we put on every time either of us need to be somewhere.”

He doesn't mention that it's too hard to pretend that they're okay when they're not.

He doesn't tell Jude that he misses him. 

“It wasn't about the deal, you know that, right?” Jude asks after a long pause. 

Zero nods. “It was about you not being man enough admit that you miss the Devils. That you feel like it's rightfully yours and seeing me in the jersey physically hurts you each time. At first, you tried to get over it, but in the end it got too much. Sound about right?”

Even as Zero speaks he knows that Jude's going to dodge the truth the same way he always does. The topic is never broached; everything that needs to be said remains unspoken. 

Jude laughs harshly. “I'm not doing this with you.”

_ Surprise, surprise.  _

Zero gestures towards the hallway. “Feel free to leave.”

Jude's mouth twists into a thin line. “Oh, don't worry, I'm not staying here with  _ you. _ ”

Despite Jude's words, there's no attempt to leave. 

Hours later, Zero turns over to where Jude is lying next to him. They're both sweaty and sated, but too tired to regret this now. 

Regret will come in the morning, when the bright hues of daylight make it hard to forget that it never happened at all. 

“You have a funny way of  _ not  _ doing this with me,” Zero says into the darkness, his voice almost a soft whisper. 

Jude doesn't respond. 

~

Zero enters his next meeting with Devils management fully expecting to land himself with the burden of his final year, but walks away with the two years that he wanted all  along. 

“What the hell just happened?” he asks his agent, who looks just as stunned as he feels. “I thought we only had one year on the table?”

His agent shrugs. “They must have received a substantial offer for you and panicked over the prospect of losing you to a rival.”

Zero thinks about last night and how easy it was for him and Jude to fall into old habits. He thinks about how Jude was quieter than usual. Normally, there's some kind of lecture or misguided advice, but yesterday Jude was silent. 

He's guessing that it wasn't a coincidence. 

~

Once again, Jude's waiting for Zero when he reaches the house. He's sitting on the floor of the hallway, hugging his knees to his chest, with his ever present phone in his hand. He's startled when Zero shuts the door but tries to conceal it by unfolding his legs and standing quickly.  

“I hear that congratulations are in order,” he says after he follows Zero into the spacious kitchen. It's weird knowing that he's been by himself in  _ their  _ house while Jude stays at his condo across town. There are too many reminders here, too many things that scream  _ we can't just throw what we had away.  _

“Yeah, thanks to you,” Zero says quietly after a moment. He pours himself a glass of water and hops onto one of the bar stools. Jude comes closer and stops short of taking a seat next to him. 

Jude raises his hands innocently. “I have no idea what you're talking about.”

The twinkle in his eyes says otherwise but Zero decides to leave it. He gets to play for another two years, he can't be mad about that and if Jude had a hand in the matter, that's just one more reason why he wishes they could get over this wedge between them. 

“Where does this leave us?” he asks finally with an imploring look. “We can't just pretend to be together for the next two years. That can't be healthy. Or normal.”

Jude huffs out a breathy laugh and looks away. “I think we lucked out on normal a long time ago.”

“No arguments here,” Zero replies. He doesn't take his eyes off Jude because he can't. He has to drink in the sight, take in all that he can now just in case he can't fix this. 

There's a pause before Jude looks back at him and says, “I don't...I never wanted to break up with you. Why do you think I'm here all the time?”

He sounds earnest but he's been a blank canvas for the past few months and it's only now that Zero's starting to see a picture. He's not really sure what he's looking at.

“To get your rocks off?” he answers, because for all of their  _ not talking  _ there's been a lot of slip-ups. There was the time Zero went to drop off some things at Jude's office. The time Jude came by to pick up some more clothes. The bathroom at the last movie premiere they went to. 

_ Yesterday. _

“No, because I miss you, stupid, and I know that you miss me too - we're just too stubborn to be honest.” Jude's words are frank and to the point, and Zero can't argue with his assessment. 

“Fine, but what about everything that's happened?” Zero replies. “We can't brush all of that under the rug.”

They can't pretend that their huge blow up didn't occur; that they didn't both say things that they wouldn't take from anyone else. 

Jude rubs at his chin and blows out a gentle breath, like he needs to calm himself down. 

“I'm sorry for my part, sorry for pushing so hard for you to set me free or whatever,” he says. “In some messed up way, I was hoping that you'd change your mind.”

Zero stares at him incredulously. “Change my-- _ you  _ broke up with me.”

“I know,” Jude says as matter-of-factly. 

There's a small smile on his face and Zero can't help the laugh that escapes his lips. None of this is funny, but sometimes, it's hard to believe just how fucking stupid they can be. Jude joins in after a second and they laugh together, their eyes locked just as they begin to sober up.

Zero hopes that this is a turning point. 

He's already gotten the deal he wanted, but that pales in comparison to what (and  _ who _ ) he really needs - Jude. 

Jude places his hand on Zero's shoulder and rubs at it gently before he says, “I really am sorry.”

Zero takes his hand and spins around so that his body is angled towards Jude. 

“I know you are,” he tells him. “I know. And I'm sorry too.”

He pulls Jude in, closing the space between them. 

“Don't go anywhere again,” he adds because while he might not ever freely admit it, living without Jude is something that he can't do. The past few months have been cold, lonely and he's sure that he was a few weeks away from straight up  _ begging  _ Jude to come back. 

Jude smiles tremulously. “I never left. Not really.”

Zero considers the way that Jude's waited for him in some form every day this week. The way he managed to get information about his contract talks by playing it off as interest due to their public relationship. He might have left the house but he's been around constantly, and it's only now that Zero realises why. 

“Guess you didn't.”

Jude grins down at him and Zero climbs off the stool without letting go. Jude's breath hitches but he doesn't say anything, he just watches Zero silently. 

Zero knows that this isn't over and that they have a lot more to discuss, but right now all he wants to do is kiss his man. 

So he does. 

_ Fin.  _


End file.
